In the Gulf of Oman
I feel the waters’ pull, floating,
and fishes glinting eyes, wary,
watching; from corals bubbles rise,
growing, as I breathe, and roll.
I feel the waters’ pull, drifting;
wet sunbeams crossing sands, diamonds
shifting, warming, waltzing, lazy;
woven with the flow, and ebb.
I feel the waters’ pull, deepening;
a darker shade of blue, misting –
imagined bigger fish, watching,
rising. Hastened by fear, I turn.
I have always loved swimming, and rarely get the chance to swim in such clear and warm waters (and full of life) as the Gulf of Oman. It’s beautiful, although there is still that nagging fear when it gets too deep to see the bottom that there might be something big and hungry down there!
I have tried to capture something of the rhythm and feeling of the waves in this poem.
Posted at Poets United and dVerse.
I think you captured it very well.
Wow, I am impressed that you got to swim in the Gulf of Oman. I enjoyed your poem. The repetition (almost) of the first lines made it seem a bit dark to me though….as if the narrator was eventually going to be pulled under. I am glad that was not the case, despite the fear in the last stanza!
what an engaging piece….
I am in love with the wordplay here…reflective of the water itself.
This is beautifully written and you captured the sense of the waves beautifully as well. I too thought it might take a dark turn and was relieved when it did not. Well done.
Beautiful piece…I love the ebb and flow. Feels as if I am floating and gliding along…lovely.
I agree with the structure comment…the repetition made for a good read. I really liked the tone switch at the end. Water is fluid, after all.
I have felt that same fear swimming across a monsterless lake. Imagination’s a powerful motivator. Your poem is powerful, too. I agree with Poet Laundry’s ebb and flow comment.
Yes, you captured this well. I’m just back from a chilly gray winter’s beach, which was beautiful, too.
I can imagine the water in the eye of my mind.
Unusually compelling. The second stanza is a real humdinger!
Your repetition and cadence lulls like a tidal rhythm. Excellent construction for topic.
You did that very well. Made me want to join you – and I am very fearful of ocean swimming!
i can feel your rhythm in this…the current can def be scary, while the rhythm of the waves so soothing
Reminded me of my visit to the Gulf, as you say the water so clear.
I can feel both the mesmerizingness and the fear. I think you did quite an excellent job in describing “the waters’ pull.”
the poem conveys the movement of the waves very well…the repetition is a little ominous but very effective..thanks