Kenilworth, England (Fortress III)
by poetrydiary
In a place like Kenilworth
you see the character of a country:
a castle built for a single party,
still remembered
after four hundred years.
A queen came here once —
in the days of power
(for a week).
And so did a general,
puritanical,
and not so fond of parties,
or queens,
sixty years later blew down the walls,
drained the lake,
and spoiled the fun —
when the days were earnest
(in an hour).
But not the memory.
People come to see the walls,
not the holes.
And who would build afresh
such castles in the mind?
In these days of quiescence
(with a decade, or two,
of luck, and pain).
Such power persists
through centuries —
time to deal with it?
(Not here, not now).
Not ever —
in a place like Kenilworth.
© Matthew Rhodes 2011
Good Heavens! And you are worried about being repetitive! You’re having fun now aren’t you? May I make observations about some of the punctuation? Do you want any specific feedback? If no, I’ll keep being general; if yes, I’ll stay within whatever line you are comfortable with. If you are curious about my credentials, so to speak, I taught English and creative writing for twenty years, and I’m a writer. Meanwhile, I wait for the next poem with anticipation.
Yes please, specific feedback would be very welcome. (And I did struggle with the punctuation quite a lot, too! For example, ‘-‘ tends to indicate complete despair as to what to use..).
I really appreciate your comments, and am grateful. I always feel I came to creative writing a little late and so missed out on that bit of our education system when I had the chance.
I have looked at your blog too, and am sorry I’m not managing to follow your prompts (at least at the moment). My writing is somewhat random and opportunistic and fits in around lots of other stuff, so I tend to follow my mood of the moment… The castles thing is a new experiment as well.
Thanks again.
Matthew
Thank you Margo for your comments and suggestions. You’ll see I have incorporated most and I hope you like the reworked ending.
Matthew
Oh, yes. That is nice. And, my touchstone: it reads aloud beautifully. Glad to have helped. Having studied every castle in England I am going to enjoy this tour.